Day and day and another day ..life is passing by… and I am like stuck in the middle where only things around me have moved and me stuck with nothing but to just look at how things have gone…people have moved and I did nothing to move with the change.
Amazing how one dream can shatter you so much that when you get up u feel so sucked out that it should have never finished untill I could have completely lost my last breath. 3 months in succession with the pain that moved me from myself to hell has been absolute bewilderness. I cant blame others cuz no one wants to trust that its not me who has been the mistaken one always. I dont want to prove to the world when I know my heart speaks to me that I wasnt a wrong one… I still cant be wrong with innerself.. it lets me grow on myself.
Being alone has been my strength but also its my weakness. I hate to dream and that too the dreaded dreams of myself getting shattered again and again. I stopped sleeping and it went by… When I wanted that some1 to be by my side .. there was no one to be there …. my friends >who friends< Everyone has a busy life of thier own. To do something good for others always turns out to be other way around …. atleast I never had a bad content of ideas or thoughts that went through my head.
World needs one to surive ..surive how .. money – materialistic world. Materialistic things which never are worth me … take what you want and give me what i need. A single soul who can try to stand by me when I need to can answer my questions. But that single soul is one that is scared of this world where you should have a name to the relation that you have. why ? Why ? should there be a name? I just want to be someone who wants to be Known for what all he did. Not for what the world did for him. World never did anything for me..
I take my pride in saying ‘I’ before I say what I did. Lyf sucks but not me.. I just believe in what I have is not mine but is for everyone around me. Each thing has its end but I hope not to see an end of myself before I reach that end. Heading toward another end of an year .. hope to put down a complete brief of what happened around the 12 months that made this year..year of disappointments – year 2005.
I want to ……….
live like a bird again
love like a human
learn like a child
leave myself alone
listen to my heart
lead like MaX. …..
I want to
forget my past
forgive my pals
I want to ……………
Do so much that I should know that I did it all by myself .
Kill my pain .. kill my pain ..kill my pain
I am not scared but I just want what i need the most …
R U LISTENING ………….. I miss U all… give ma hug, show me da light, I want want want….