Time and again, this question has been asked so many times for how to manage life when you are in love, want sex and have a long distance relationship. Recently, a friend of mine who happens to be in love had been separated from her boyfriend due to the regional boundaries and other facts based on native origin. The scenario in the question is not just about the fact that Love makes you go blind, Sex becomes a need and Long Distance a barrier. Addressing all three at the same time becomes even more interesting that we humans decide what we want and how we are going to get it that defines satisfaction.
You can easily define all three of them pretty good given you sort them individually. Challenge comes to shove when you are asked to define yourself in love added with need of fuelling sex drive and divide all of it with distance (may be borders) that keep you away.
Love is blind for the matter it is proven with time that you seek to understand what actually is love and what drives the love for you to live in love or out of love. Love brings in lot of responsibilities, understandings and ways to keep your life going that includes the benefits of togetherness. Love gives you a reason to enjoy life and bring lot of new things in your life regardless what your surroundings might be. All good gloomy things don’t last that long and wear out after a period of time. Of course people reading this blog who have been in love know it that Love slows down in the way you felt it the first time or was made to feel that way by your emotions. You defined new things in your life and made yourself feel comfortable with it. With time you moulded the things so much that everything else started to lose its charm and the eventual mend of the human brain took that turn and you move ahead of being in Love. Being practical here, Love wears out if you are too much in it for making yourself blind and stopping the freedom. For us humans’ falling in love is always easier than staying in it forever.
One thing leads to another the chain of human bonding needs that physical togetherness something which is hard coded into the genes of our desires and characteristics. Agree or not, we all have it within us. Some to say who are in love, it becomes more of chained process to live your desires, lust and sensual emotions with that one person they have been expecting it all the time. Again that weariness comes in sooner or later. Being true, for not that I have never looked out of a relationship – I have. I had a huge history of not being able to contain myself once because of my ex who was too possessive to even see me with another woman. She would throw tantrums that eventually lead me to get away from her. I got accepted in myself being human is more to be being yourself. If you are not yourself you are more or less living a life based on lies around you and your volcano of lies will erupt causing you all the hurt. Why hide it when you have it, I have not cheated on my partner but her being aware of who I am – she understands the fact it is more to personality than to the person. Defining it all may not be best since I already know many of you readers are going to come to the point – It doesn’t matter. It does depending on which gender of sex you are. Prolific thinking guys won’t accept it for all that given matter of fact to prove his innocence and a girl would not go that route for it’s against the typical society upbringing. Our taboos of do and don’ts when it comes to being in a society are generally not openly accepted. Hidden we live these desires and lock them down in the closed doors back our darkest corners. The three letter word becomes a good way to inspire you to stay in love or to be in love and seek no more. For those who seek to see beyond that are generally famed with various names of cheap and dirty levels since others can’t keep up with those thoughts. Sex is a part that some can contain and some cannot contain whether you are in love or ahead of love. To spice up things one is generally not to keen that it takes an effort of not one but two persons if especially you are in love. Anyways those lessons later on, the gist of everything here is being honest to your needs and desire is way above cheating and hiding yourself.
Now spice up the real excitement, add the long distance relationship to the love and sex part. Everything becomes even more spiced up knowing that part of the game is way incomplete in its real essence. Love has a meaning that is completed with sex being part of the package and then the real person in itself is way too far to complete this very interesting part of love life. Connected by the virtual life who can be separated in this world whether you live 2 hours away or 2000miles away given Skype, telephone and video conferencing is so much a part of our existence. Relationship remains where it was, you live in a shell of its own which is incomplete unless you really live together 24x7x365 routine to know whether you can exist together or not.
Bring in all the three – Love, Sex and Long Distance Relationship; in the picture again. Condition starts to add into everything would your partner want to understand you given you love him/her but you have desires that hang over you all the time. Now do you want to break it up for all the good or the bad things? Would you carry on the sailing ship till the next coast through the tides of high and low given you are on the platform which supports both its ends. In long distance relationships where you already know each other and are separated the fact of being honest, open and able to say yourself of your desires will not only keep you in safe haven it will also bond your relationship if it is for real.
Downsides of all this is hurt. One person knocking out the other out of a relationship/love or completely hiding the facts will all lead to an unrecoverable damage. You need to understand what all is involved when you set your feet on a boat that is sailing because of you two. When one bails out the other one would cease to sink or eventually battle out the braves all alone. Better keep in mind what you seek what you desire and if you can iron out your desires with distance that keeps you waiting for long.
FreeBirD 